Alone in a Crowd – A Youth’s Story of Isolation

What is a period in your life when you felt like your mental health was unstable or deteriorating? Um, I'd say a period of time when I've really struggled with my mental health was 7th grade and going into 8th grade. Um, this was when it was peak co, so it was also quarantine and lockdown. And in the transition from sixth grade to lockdown, um I I lost a lot of friends just because I couldn't keep in touch with them. And so I was really starting to feel a sense of isolation and loneliness. And this ended up in me kind of not having many people to talk to. And that really took its toll on me along with in 8th grade I went to a new school and I didn't really like the school at all. Um those people had known each other since preschool. So they already formed their friend groups and I felt like an outsider. I just didn't enjoy anything at that time. So, it really took its toll on me and I started to go through a period of mental distress. Um, so I felt very sad, very depressed, and I struggled with a lot of things from eating to taking care of myself. It was it was a really rough time in my life and I'm really glad to get out of that. Was it easy to open up with others at school and your friends about these mental health struggles? No, it it wasn't easy. I'd say sharing my mental struggles with my friends was actually really really difficult because I feel like I feel like when it's an issue you go through mentally or a battle you're fighting mentally, it's harder to tell and show other people. You know, like if you scrape your elbow and fall down and scrape your elbow, you can you can show them your elbow, they'll be able to see that you're physically hurting, but how are you supposed to show people that you're mentally hurting? And on top of that, it kind of felt like like I had no reason to be sad and I just was sad. So, I was like, "What's wrong with me? I can't tell people about this because they're going to think something's wrong with me and I don't know what's going on." So, definitely opening up to others was incredibly hard. It was probably the hardest part about it all. Was it easy to open up at home about the struggles you were going through? I'd say telling my family was also extremely difficult. Um, as an Indian, I feel like obviously we don't really talk about mental health that much. Uh, you know, when we have people coming over, my parents are checking up on me. It's always how's school? How do you feel physically? How's the extracurriculars going on? And there's a bunch of things that are mentioned and talked about, but mental well-being and mental health isn't one of them ever really. And I think it's it's also hard to do because my parents obviously moved across the world for me and my brother. And so it's like, how can I be ungrateful? Well, it's not ungrateful, but you know, I don't want to I don't want them to think that I'm being ungrateful by being sad when they've provided me with everything and more and they've been so supportive. But sometimes you just you just have to go through it and that's fine. But obviously talking about this in the household was really, really hard, especially since we don't really talk about mental health. So, and what would you say was the most important thing that helped you during your struggle? I'd say the single most important thing that helped me out of this period was definitely opening up. Uh as hard as it was to open up. I think once I talked to my friends and once I realized that there are people who struggled before me and there are people who will struggle after, you know, this mental well-being, mental health issues are very common actually. And once you sort of hear about other people's stories and you sort of talk with your friends and realize they're going through similar things as you, it becomes a lot easier. you know, I started stopped feeling like I was a problem or I had a problem and just kind of accepted it as a challenge to overcome. And I think especially when you open up to your friends, you realize like how much they love you and how many how many people around you are actually there for you in times of your struggle. And so opening up and just being able to talk about it and putting myself in a position where I was vulnerable with my friends was definitely the most helpful thing to me overcoming this issue. What is the biggest lesson that you learned from that journey that you still carry with you today? Uh, one thing I learned from this was definitely the power of opening up. I feel like there is nothing better than just talking about what you're going through. And I think definitely what I learned the most is that if I'm feeling something, I should voice it because as humans, there's only so much we can bubble and hold in within ourselves that bottle, not bubble, but there's only so much we can hold in within ourselves that will eventually burst, you know, and that's what causes mental distress and breakdowns. And so I realized that it's just very very important to just talk about how you're feeling and voice your opinion cuz if you're uncomfortable or you're sad with something then you just you should let it be known and so you can get the proper help you need and you can get more support from your friends. And also I feel like especially with mental health something that I personally thought about was how there are signs. Yes. And we as people should be aware of those signs but there's also it's really hard to tell when someone's struggling. And so if you're struggling and I personally feel like I wanted help, then I would have to talk about it. And I think that's the hardest part, but it's the most important thing to do. What would you say to someone who's going through the same thing that you went through? Yeah. So if I was talking to someone who was going through similar things to what I went through, I think I would just tell them that they're not alone. You know, I feel like when we go through mental health issues, we feel like we're alone. We certainly isolate ourselves sometimes subconsciously and it feels like we have no one else around us that understands us. But there are people who have suffered before you and there are people who will suffer suffer after. So you have a ton of people you can talk to about this and I know that opening up is hard. I I understand that being vulnerable is hard but it's something important to do so that you can get the best help that you deserve. And really I think that's the most important part of it all. I think just just tell people what you're feeling if you can and if you're com to do so because that's so so incredibly important and just just know you're not alone. You know, there's so many people out there who have struggled similar to you. There's so many stories of people who've had struggles similar to you. So yeah, just reach out and you'll find the help you need. [Music]